Why Child Abuse – Child rearing and misconceptions

Regarding the training of children, Imam Qalandar Baba Auliya (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
“On the Day of Resurrection, Allah will not ask the parents what you have fed your children, what they have watered, and what kind of clothing you have clothed. How did you train? ”
For the good training of children, it is important to avoid reprimanding, scolding, and cursing your children. Instead of being annoyed at their misdeeds, shortcomings, and expressing anger, lovingly persuade them to do so. Choose good things;
Lying to a child is disliked by his parents, but they do not consider why their child is lying ․․․? Admittedly, he faces a lot of reprimand for this.

When a child sees that he is being reprimanded for telling the truth, then he starts misrepresenting. At the same time, appreciate telling the truth, so that he feels that he has made a mistake or negligence, he did not lie and it is a good thing to tell the truth.
Sometimes some negative emotions also start to flourish in children, such as the emotion of jealousy, it is interpreted as an invisible fire, which burns a person from within.
So stay away from jealousy and then being a mother, then you will never want your child to burn in the fire of jealousy so much that his own personality is distorted, but sadly some parents do not want Even so, they instill in their children the habit of jealousy. Obviously, they do not teach envy directly, but indirectly instill it in their minds.
They compare their children to siblings, brothers, friends and cousins, etc., so much so that the child loses his own identity. So before you compare your child, think that you Do not distort the personality of the child. If comparison is necessary, keep balance in it. And keep it in such a way that it serves as a hobby.

When a child gets hurt, we say to encourage him, “Be brave, son! You are my brave child, get up quickly, well done!” It is said from childhood. It is not good to be a coward and parents never want to make their child cowardly, but sometimes it happens that parents make their child cowardly, as if If I have a problem or an obstacle, they immediately go ahead and do it.
When he encounters an obstacle in his life, he feels that he does not have the ability to remove any obstacle in his way on his own. Therefore, parents should always have children. Give the child the opportunity to try to overcome the obstacles on his own first, so that in the future this child can rely on his strong arm.

Parents and other people who come into their lives make their children realize that they have no opinion of their own, but don’t know why when children deny their own caste, it also makes the parents feel very bad. So at least in this case they should give them as much advice in life, as much as necessary and try to support them in what they are doing or want to do in life.
Encourage them to have confidence in themselves if they are to succeed.
Most of the time, if a child says something wrong at a party or a party, then the parents start teasing and scolding him, which makes the child feel that everything else in this world is right. Children should never be targeted in public, even by their friends and siblings.
If they have made a mistake, let them know later that they have made a mistake and try not to let it happen again.
Some parents do not consider it necessary to take their children to the market for shopping and go and bring their own things for the children, but when they give the things to the children, they are not interested in them and they Like other people’s things.

Parents may have their own attitude, when children speak to their parents and they do not get the answer in the way they are expecting, then they feel that they may pay attention to being rude. Could find
The best solution is to break your fears or problems into a series of smaller steps.
When you don’t pay attention to your child’s feelings, the child may react in the same way. Therefore, caution is needed in this regard. It is important to give space to, because children have their own mind and temperament.

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